... (triple dots meaning WHAT THE **** JUST HAPPENED?!)

*There will most likely be swearing in the blog, so if you are offended by coarse language and discussions, "discussions" of mature subject matter please close your window or go to GameFAQs to vote at the character battle, thank you.*

Well, I just received Evangelion: Death and Rebirth + End of Evangelion today in the mail.

I watched Evangelion: Death, which was the hour recap of stuff that occurred in the first 24 episodes, which was good, I liked it, it had style, it had flair, it had good classical music. That was a good recap.

Hmm...maybe I should start from the beginning...


THE BEGINNING!

Okay, so I wake up at like 6, which felt wierd because I kind of just woke up, and then I looked at the clock, saw it was six and thought (wow, I never get up this early, what was I expecting: to wake up when it's dark outside? Because it was dark outside, well, "shady" so you know, not dark). Anyway, then I had a revelation that I never knew when I fell asleep, which then was like "What the fuck?" since it just felt kind of wierd.

Anyway, then I decided, screw it, I'm going back to sleep, but I couldn't sleep, so then I just layed there for about an hour, then got up, and started watching tv.

Good god, it was boring.

Absolutely nothing to watch, so I watched old school shows like "Stickin' Around" which was just plain wierd and then...SO3! No wait, I went online to see my startup time for UofT, which is 6:45....PM! Well, that and I wanted to track my package from Amazon, and it turns out it reached the post office last night (hence the notice it shipped) so then I was like "OH YEAH! I'm getting it today!"

THEN I played SO3, synth'ed in another 8 +500 ATT into a laser weapon, and gave it to Nel, so then Maria, Cliff + Nel had laser weapons with + 4000 attack. Then I decided, it was time....TO GO TO SPHERE!

Well, last night, I faced Azazer, and beat him in less than a minute, so I got that BT (I got the beat him w/o taking damage in my first play through, using a load of MP bombs, oh yah....) so then I moved on, went to level 5, got some items, and screamed out (in my head of course) *meekly* "Oh god...". [ In other words, it wasn't so much a scream as it was a meek cry for help]

I had to face Berial and Belezeber, or in my fan names, rocket launcher guy and gay man with a giant whip.

Well, I beat them in less than a minute, so whoopee! Then loaded it up again and beat them without taking damage! My god, refined weapons help SO much! Belezeber died fast, and Berial....well him and his rocket launcher....

Anyway, then went back to Styx (which scared me because of...triple boss battle!), killed Proclaimer FAST, then Enforcer FAST (with some help from my bombs of course) then...the Convictor...

He died, fast. My note: Never do any work, and support with EM bombs, with refined weapons Maria and Cliff can handle it. Picked up both BTs (less than a minute + w/o damage) like THAT.

Then did some shit, and before I knew it, it was like 10:30, so I turned off my PS2 and watched Dawson's Creek till 12. Garsh, it's so sappy, I love it.


Then at about 11:15 AM I thought I heard voices outside, so then I ran downstairs, to see if my mailbox was open, but I couldn't see it, so then I had to open the door and check, and OH! Package!

Opened it up, awtched the rest of Dawson's Creek, opened the box, struggled trying to get the two DVDs out (there's a mousepad inside! It's hard!) and then (with gloves, because it IS two sided) stuffed in Death and Rebirth.

Now we have swearing, and spoilers, yes.

So Death was just the recap, but it had some style, basically it had backstage of an Auditorium Shinji preparing to go live with his cello, so then it shows some stuff about Shinji, then Asuka joins him practicing, and then it shows Asuka, and Rei comes (in silence of course) and blah blah, and then ANOTHER SHADOW?! It's Kaworu Nagisa (soooooo cool!) but you don't see him, but there's only one character with a voice that...smooth.

So then...Death ended...with a pretty decent song, and then the credits, which were LONG.....so I looked for food, when the credits ENDED my screen said "THE STORY CONTINUES" (in caps) and then "Intermission."

5 minutes.

Now I would have skipped it for two reasons.

a) Rebirth is like the first 30 minutes of End of Evangelion.

b) It was 5 minutes!!!!

But I was like "Nah, it has cool orchestral music" so I listened to it, which looking for more food (and trying to kill a fly...)

Then Rebirth started, and I'm sorry but it just surprised me, in a bad way.

Yeah, Shinji is a guy, yeah there is a 17+ rating, yeah Asuka is lying there with no bra on (she's in a coma....or something), but THAT DOES NOT GIVE HIM THE RIGHT TO MASTURBATE!

So yeah, first 5 minutes and it scared me....well least he said aloud exactly what I was thinking (well, not exactly).

"I'm so fucked up."

I was thikning "He's so fucked up." so yeah, not exactly.

God, are you guys (or guy, whatever) still there? Wow, if you're hanging in there I suggest you take a break, because I'll keep going.

So then hte rest of it was fine, lots of action (it's a shonen) and cool.....action....yeah....that's mostly it, just action. Lots of killing, bombing, killing, super crazy Asuka, super fucked up looking Evangelions...and...END!

God...and that was Rebirth, and it had a cool ending theme too. Yes....very cool. Just like how the first CCS movie had a cool ending theme. Except the 2nd one didn't...you see where I'm getting at?

So....intermission, it'll go on...yeah..

INTERMISSION!






Back? Already? Hey the garbage truck is here (finally).

Well, taking out Death and Rebirht, and then sticking in ENd of Evangelion, I had an idea of what to expect for the first 30 mins....

Skipping the masturbation part...OKAY! Wathced the rest again...and then the continuation. With the 9 new Evas (with S2 engines! They can move for an indefinite period of time!) and Asuka without an umbilical cable (she has no S2 engine....and the cable is busted, like 4 mins of power left) it was pure....killing....WHICH WAS GOOD!

Which was good.....

Oh and Shinji made out with Misato, but it wasn't so much as making out as it was Misato dying and trying to urge Shinji to take up arms, except she did say "That was an adult kiss, we'll do the rest later." So...well she's dead, so ha ha, I mean bad! Misato is cool and all, but...COME ON! SHIJNJI YOU WIMP! YOU DON'T NEED A WOMAN TO ENTICE YOU WITH...STUFF TO FIGHT!

So Misato is dead....and then Ritsuko dies later (because of a strange....oh nevermind) and then Shinji's dad, Gendo makes contact with Yui, his wife, through Rei, the clone, well through Rei and Adam, and....oh it was just disturbingin. Not in THAT way per say, but the fact that he's so deseperate to see Yui again to use so much....people.....and.....god what do I call Rei? Angel? Human? Strange thing?

So where am I? Oh yes, and then Asuka kills the last Eva, but she runs out of power....and then a weapon goes flying at her, and it turns into a Lance of Longius (a fake) and goes through her head, and then she goes berseker (but with the fake lance in the ground...and it's through her head...she can't exactly get up you know?) and then the Eva series goes back online (like back alive....OH GOD IT WAS FUCEKD!) and then...uh....

Well, my jaw was open, faster than when I saw Liuba and Jared at Pizza Pizza...

Let's see, Shinji gets into Unit 01, just to see Unit 02 being...well they're in pieces, being carried by the Eva series like a pack of vultures....and you see guts and EVERYTHING!

Shinji goes crazy? Check.

Eva 01 grows wings? Check.

The original Lance of Longius enters Unit 01? Check.

Anti AT fields online? Check.

Tree of Life is recreated? Check.

Instrumentality Project succeeds? Che---------

Well, more wierd stuff between Shinji and Rei? Check.

Looks like (naked) Rei is sitting on a naked Shinji's area? Check.

Made more sensical because Rei has her arms IN Shinji? Check.

Everybody turning to...goo? Check.

Shinji turning everything back to the way it was? Check.

Earth is completely scarred by the Third Impact? Check.

Shinji tries to kill a comatose Asuka? Check.

End game with lots of questions still being questioned? Check.

Steven Fong not being able to sleep tonight? Double Check.

Steven Fong wishing there were another Eva enthusiast to talk to? Check.

Me wishining Hideaki Anno NEVER remade the last two episodes? Definately...

I'm watching the movie again, next week. Next week.

Right now, I need SO3, or CCS, or...SOMETHING to take my mind off it....

What the fuck did I miss in the past couple of years? Jebus cripes.....no no...Jesus Christ (forgive me Lord...)

Never....


Take Neon Genesis Evangelion....then screw around with it about 10 times over....now you have the movie.

Now you have the movie...

Honestly, if you read the entire post, then not only have you had parts of the movie spoiled, but you have infinite patience.


My opinion:

If you aren't REALLY open minded: You will hate and End of Evangelion.

If you aren't open minded: You may or may not like End of Evangelion.

If you are open minded: Run, run far away, unless your mind is already fucked beyond comprehension.....

If you hate anime: Why are you reading this?

So yeah, if your mind is already fucked beyond all comprehension, then watch Eva, you MAY enjoy it, personally?




Great, just a-fucking-mazing, just amazing, never before have I seen something so....well...quite frankly so very cool. It isn't a mecha, I'll give it that, it's different, it examines the human mind, and who we are as humanity. It's great. Honestly. I can't wait to watch FLCL! Next year.


Next year....

Maybe Serial Experiments Lain can wait till next year as well....